my weapon :: essays research papers

my weapon wake up! wake up! did you hear me say WAKE THE FUCK UP!? serene sunlight gleaming in my eyes i slowly rise with a crooked-face expression, eyebrows half way off my face, the taste of that overnight blunt stapled to the tip of my tongue and shopping through my taste buds. i take a deep breath, inhaling life into my lungs and salute the new day as a blessing. i see a pen resting. it's pleading me to pick it up and filter my being. gotta have it, so i grab it. feel the fragile but fluent flow of the pen conceiving thoughts held deep within. the ink oozing through its sides being penetrated by my flow. aqueous strokes assuaging my soul. hands clasp fast, manually massaging my mating mechanism. trying hard to find control and express realism. lost in a solitude of thought, i start to dwell on a time when freedom expelled and i fell into a hell i called my conventional cell, a little 8X8 room adorned with adolescent arrogance and innocent ignorance. aqua net bottles being trampled by nike sponsored 100% cotton pillow cases. spit swallowed blunts chillin behind the endless stock of hot cheeto bags. role models consisted of the ones with the gats and the weed sacks, a newly-dawning seed, i became part of a media-spawning breed, thought monetary accomplishment was the way you could succeed it was all about the benjamin's right? $80 jeans just to fit in and be tight. another $80 to experience the 'vintage' look @ GAP. saw the degradation of my generation in its obsession with immediate gratification. a teenage soul lost in a premature matured reality, unknown space caused the escape of my individuality, responsibility became nothing but a formality. began exploring the untamed and constantly apparent realm of sexuality. falling through the cracks of the gang banging mentality. 19th and mission, another fatality. i began my journey of questioning morality living in a society that teaches sex education in 3rd grade. so much violence on TV, my sensitivity starts to fade. i see sheep being led off a cliff, not knowing the black sheep was being paid. thoughts of family begin to scatter as a barrage of TV becomes my espionage of what a family should be. time to switch channels. click another ESL student stricken to silence. click fremont high state basketball champs, but can't read.